Imagine there is a splinter in your finger and it’s touching a nerve. It’s probably pretty painful and you basically have two choices: either ensure nothing touches it or take it out. At first you may try to squeeze it out, but if that doesn’t work, you may just leave it in the hope that it will work its way out on its own.
Our main instinct is to protect ourselves and we go to extremes to avoid feeling pain. You might end up avoiding social situations, which you usually enjoy, so that you don’t have to shake anyone’s hand because it might hurt your finger. You might end up having to do things like eating or typing with one hand as it is too uncomfortable to use your other hand. As long as the splinter remains, your daily routines are compromised and your life is inconvenienced.
The same goes for unexpressed emotion. If, for example, we are faced with a situation which we believe could result in conflict were we to express how we truly felt about something, the chances are that we would swallow the emotion and keep quiet … just to keep the peace, appear amenable, not hurt someone etc. Unfortunately, a by-product of such “considerate” behaviour is that, in not being honest with ourselves, we begin to store up discontent and unhappiness, and we amend our behaviour to avoid similar situations in the future … so, for example, we avoid people we would possibly have enjoyed seeing and no longer go to social or work events which might have been fun.
In both cases, if we don’t resolve the root cause of the problem, it ends up running our lives.
My “Live Life, Feeling Well” Health Transformation Programme has been created to help you to remove your emotional splinters.
Approximately 80% of GP visits are for stress-related illness, for which there is unfortunately no cure. And although things are slowly changing, there is scant acknowledgement of a Mind/Body connection in western medicine. However, you only need to think about how you blush when you are embarrassed or how you get palpitations when you are fearful to know that there is a definite connection between the two.
So if this is the case, what about sadness or loneliness or stress? These also have an impact on us and so illness is a combination of physical and emotional causes.
When our thoughts or emotions remain unacknowledged or unexpressed they get pushed deep inside us and over a period of time we become human pressure cookers! Emotional pain is as real as physical pain but it can be much more invasive. Emotions such as anger or resentment can severely debilitate our energy and, if we do nothing to resolve things or let the emotion out, eventually something has to give – and it’s usually the weakest part of us: the result is often depression, anxiety, disturbed sleep, headaches, digestive disorders and a generally weakened immune system.
Our thoughts and emotions are like seeds which germinate and grow inside us and it is our job to tend them and ensure they are nourished. Just as in the garden, we need to remove the unwanted weeds inside of us, which in the case of thoughts and emotions, tend to be issues such as disempowering beliefs and negative attitudes. It is also important to review unresolved conflicts and unhealthy boundaries in our relationships as well as the contents of the chatter in our head (which is often full of resentments, feelings of helplessness and general stress).
If you would like to know more about the areas of your life in which your emotional splinters might be lurking, then you just need to take a look at the situations in which you currently feel stress or which appear not to be working as you would like. An initial chat with me could provide you with clarity about how to approach and begin to resolve these issues so that you can feel lighter and happier moving forward.
Did you know that each of your body’s symptoms, and its position on your body, tells you a lot about the belief or emotion you are suppressing? For example, any pain or discomfort in a joint will possibly have something to do with inflexibility (yours or someone who is treating you inflexibly). If you have stomach pains, your body is trying to alert you to something in your life which you don’t like (or can’t stomach). If you have lower back pain, your struggle is with support (giving too much to someone else or not receiving enough yourself) or money. It’s like learning a new language. It’s just a question of slowing down long enough to listen and then interpreting what you hear.
When you recognise the beliefs, thoughts or behaviours which no longer serve you, you will be in a position to change them … and then your body will no longer need to get your attention by creating symptoms and your sense of wellbeing will improve dramatically.
If you would like to experience improvements in your health and wellbeing or if you are tired of struggling with the same recurring situations or symptoms in your life, please contact me to find out what my “Live Life, Feeling Well” health transformation programme can do to help you.